6 sept 2008

Peace that comes from the weirdest place

There is a certain peace that comes hand in hand with a great operation.
For a period of time those who must submit to a significant surgery are forced to deal with a great amount of stress and pain but are blessed with a great amount of peace.
We are able to see the world just as it is, but manage to leave aside the unimportant things.
For a while we are able to truly see what is unclear in the routine. What is worth fighting for suddenly becomes obvious, just as what has always been there becomes precious.
It is under these kinds of circumstances where you truly appreciate the loving family and true friends who manage to make a dent in their routine and glance your way. It is amazing how everyday life moves over to a secondary spot where school, work and future plans have no meaning anymore.
It is with a big scare, a humongous change of plans and a great deal of pain killers and anesthesia that make up your mind about the truly big things. Like love.

Right now I can’t help but feel like a puppet every now and then. Having to forcefully adapt to what is thrown my way, living at a great expense to others.
But I know that in the future I will look back onto these last few weeks not with sadness and a feeling of uselessness dealing with my inability to perform basic tasks, or with a great deal of anger because of my change in plans. I have come to understand that something this big was needed to get me to see. It wasn’t that I was blind, I was simply looking in the wrong direction.

A wise friend once told me that experiences are what make you grow. I’m just sorry that it took an operation to see it all.

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